In a diplomatic frostbite that could rival Greenland’s icy tundra, Denmark fired back at US Vice President JD Vance after he delivered some rather chilly remarks about Copenhagen’s commitment to the world’s largest island.
During a visit to Pituffik Space Base (formerly Thule Air Base) in northwestern Greenland—a place so strategically important it might as well come with its own James Bond theme music—Vance accused Denmark of neglecting the people and security needs of the resource-rich territory.
“We are open to criticism,” said Danish Foreign Minister Lars Lokke Rasmussen on X, channeling his best polite-but-irritated tone. “But let me be completely honest—we don’t appreciate the tone in which it’s being delivered.”
He added, “This is not how you speak to your close allies, and I still consider Denmark and the United States to be close allies.” Translation? “Hey, USA, we’re Team Freedom, not your awkward family reunion relatives.”
Vance didn’t hold back during his press conference, going full Trumpian bravado by declaring, “Our message to Denmark is very simple: You have not done a good job by the people of Greenland.”
He then doubled down, accusing Denmark of under-investing in both Greenlanders and their security architecture—as if he were auditioning for a role in an action movie where NATO gets replaced by one guy yelling into a microphone.
The subtext here? Enter stage left: former President Donald Trump, who has been vocal about his desire to acquire Greenland because, apparently, national security and world peace hinge on owning an enormous chunk of frozen real estate.
On Friday, Trump told reporters at the White House, “We’re talking about international security… We’re talking about world peace.” Sure, Donny, sure. Nothing screams “world peace” like coveting someone else’s landmass.
To clarify any potential misunderstandings—or perhaps fears of military intervention—Vance assured everyone that force wouldn’t be necessary. “We think this makes sense, and because we think the people of Greenland are rational and good, we think we’re going to be able to cut a deal, Donald Trump-style,” he said. Because nothing says diplomacy quite like invoking The Art of the Deal while eyeing another country’s backyard.
Denmark’s Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen wasn’t having any of it. In a statement dripping with sarcasm (or maybe just Nordic chill), she reminded Vance that Denmark has stood shoulder-to-shoulder with America through thick and thin.
“For many years, we have stood by the Americans in very difficult situations,” she noted, referencing Danish troops fighting alongside American forces in Iraq and Afghanistan. Subtext again: “Remember those wars? Yeah, we showed up. Where’s our thank-you card?”
Frederiksen also called out Vance’s comments as inaccurate and slammed the uninvited US delegation’s visit as “unacceptable pressure” on Greenland and Denmark. It seems even Santa Claus would need permission before landing his sleigh in Nuuk these days.
Meanwhile, the people of Greenland—who number around 57,000, most of them Inuits—are decidedly unimpressed by Uncle Sam’s sudden interest. A January poll revealed that a majority of Greenlanders oppose US annexation. Who knew? Maybe they prefer polar bears over politics?
Greenland itself is no stranger to geopolitical intrigue. Once known as Thule Air Base, the Pituffik facility plays a starring role in Washington’s missile defense system, thanks to its prime location in the Arctic.
Back in the Cold War era, it served as a lookout post for Soviet attacks, making it less “winter wonderland” and more “spy thriller central.” Today, it remains crucial for air and submarine surveillance, proving that sometimes the coldest places host the hottest secrets.
Copenhagen, meanwhile, isn’t taking any chances. Earlier this year, Denmark pledged nearly $2 billion to beef up its presence in the Arctic and North Atlantic, investing in specialized vessels and surveillance tech.
Clearly, they’ve decided that if you can’t beat ‘em, prepare to defend yourself against overly enthusiastic neighbors.
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